What is your one golen rule in life?

Let’s divide life into two major experiences:

Image source quora
  • Personal experience

In 2021, my family and I were full fledge looking out for my marriage. As per the arrange marriage set up, I used to get some months’ time to understand the other person(lucky enough if it is more than a month or so) before deciding to meet someone and proceed further with a decision at every step.

When I entered into the process,

  1. I was not very mature as to what I actually need from my partner. It was all fun and games similar to the way I was spending my time with friends.
  2. I was sometimes talking to 2–3 people at a time, which should ideally decrease once a mutual bonding is established with 1 person.
  3. There was this guy I was talking to, and I liked a few qualities in him, there was another guy I was talking to and I liked few of his qualities. This way I used to be always happy through out the day. How?
    1. I was giving limited time to one person and in return getting to know only few good things about him
    2. Giving multiple people my time, and getting different good qualities through out the day.
  4. I made a decision to meet one of the guys and said yes to rishta after 1st meeting. I had no complaints of the way I was feeling since I was not much emotionally involved with anyone. All was happy happy. What happened next?
    1. After saying yes, I disconnected from every other guy of course.
    2. Slowly I started to realise that I am not happy with him. I said yes to a wrong person. There was nothing in common in depth between us
    3. Talking to him became so toxic that I broke down within 15 days after saying yes. I was diagnosed with situational depression
    4. This didn’t end here. I lost faith in myself for some time as how I can make such bad decision? I could I not understand what I really wanted?

The answer was because I didn’t give 100%. I should have taken one person at a time and given 100% of my attention and time to that person to be able to analyse things better, and never regret if something would have gone wrong as I have full efforts.

  • Professional experience

I was preparing for campus placements at IIT Bombay. I came from a non coding background (both in my bachelors and masters), but wanted to switch to data.

  1. Here it is a 15 days drive in December where hell lot of companies come for recruitment. You give interviews for which you’re selected in the earlier months.
  2. Major division is: Consultants, Software developers, data science, core elec mech civil jobs. People around me use to fill the job application form for anything and everything in which they were eligible.
  3. I stuck to single field. Filled hardly 50 JAFS at that time which was lowest among all the people around me which I could see.
  4. My friends used to shout at me that I am not sincere. I am being stubborn. It is COVID time. Take what you get. Beggars are not choosers. Etc etc
  5. I was already struggling with my expertise in data field since I was not from that background. In addition to this if I would have focused on multiple fields, I was sure I would have added nothing but stress in my life.
  6. End result: I got placed in a data science company, where I have been working with machine learning and deep learning models in my day today office life, and I couldn’t be more happy to be in the field which I selected for myself. It has been an extremely fulfilling journey when it came to learning new things and enjoying that.

This happened only because I gave my 100% that even after 1 year I am happy with the field I am in.

I believe that we have to dive into something to know the depth of it. Either you give 100% or you don’t give at all. Only then you would be able to analyse the right and wrong for yourself . Work hard and love hard. 🙂

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